Summer Smiles, Grad Gifts, and Great Giveaways
- May 31, 2023
Many of the hackers and duffers from all over the globe just tuned in FORE the very first major. I don’t know about you, but I find myself completely glued to the television the first weekend in April. So instead of fishing or shoveling the spring snow — I usually lock myself in the basement
Many of the hackers and duffers from all over the globe just tuned in FORE the very first major. I don’t know about you, but I find myself completely glued to the television the first weekend in April. So instead of fishing or shoveling the spring snow — I usually lock myself in the basement with a loaf of bread and a two-liter of soda. It’s “a tradition unlike any other,” and this legendary tournament never seems to spoil.
MOM. DAD HIT A GOLF BALL INTO THE NEIGHBORS’ GARDEN. On purpose? NO, BUT I THINK HE SHOULD COME INSIDE. HE JUST DID IT AGAIN.
I have never been to Augusta National, and many of my friends say the HD television cameras don’t do her any justice. What? The rolling hills and magnificent Magnolias are pretty dang sharp on this new 52-inch Panasonic. The layout is superb, and the course itself is absolutely flawless. Every blade of grass is just perfect, and the bunkers will never need an upgrade funded by local taxpayers.
Yes. The views are splendid, and the golf is just as brilliant. The Masters brings out the very best in the world’s top players. This year’s tournament has an added twist with the return of Tiger. He’s back in the field after missing the previous two years. Thank heavens. Woods has been playing well and several hope to see some stripes on the leaderboard come Sunday. He has recorded a few top tens in 2018, and the comeback appears to be well ahead of schedule.
There is no doubt that Tiger will be the fan favorite as his impact on the game and crowds is unrivaled. A major buzz has definitely returned to the PGA Tour — just look at the ratings. The oddsmakers have put Tiger at a 12 to 1 to claim his FIFTH green jacket. That’s incredible, and we all thought he was prime rib.
I WANT TO PLAY XBOX, BUT DAD IS WATCHING GOLF. Tell him to come upstairs. I CAN’T. HE LOCKED THE DOOR AND ISN’T RESPONDING TO ANY OF HIS TEXTS.
OK. Here is the scoop. The 2018 Masters will have already been played by the time you are all reading this. My editor needs her stuff by Thursday afternoon, and our paper goes to print every Friday morning. I usually make my deadline and pipe one 285 yards down the fairway. Then there are times when I completely whiff and shank a wedge into the hedges. Last week wasn’t my fault kids.
That being said, it would be literally impossible to predict the 2018 champion. But I can almost guarantee it will be one of the eighty-seven golfers that are currently in the field. We all have our picks, and my lovely bride’s money is on Jordan Speith. The 2015 winner’s game is perfect for Augusta, and if he can figure out that streaky putter — checkmate. I can totally picture Jordan in Butler’s Cabin.
I love Rory McIlroy too. The long-hitting foreigner has been so close, so many times, and he only needs a green jacket to complete the career slam. Rory is focused and is battle tested. Then there’s the scrappy Justin Thomas. The world’s number two never gets into trouble and is one of the most consistent young players on tour. He’s really golfing well. I could probably name another twenty-five or so players who have a legitimate chance of winning. Ready? Lefty, DJ, Kuch, Ian, Martin, Patrick, Hideki, Paul, Adam, Charley, Marc, Tony, Jason, Xander, Haotong, Henrik, Zach, Bubba, Vijay, Freddie, Sandy, Rose, Jason, Rickie, and Jon might contend for a green jacket.
The Masters really inspires me to start playing again, and I know I am not alone. There is something very special about this tournament that moves the average golf fan. Anyone else who locks themselves in the basement FORE an entire weekend? Yes. Who went outside to hit a few backyard pitch shots during a commercial break? Do you watch all of the action while stroking a few putts on the living room carpet too? It’s completely normal folks. A tradition unlike any other. Cheers.
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