Time flies. The older one gets, the faster things appear to spin around you. For me, the time between Memorial Day and the Fourth of July annually seems to go by in the blink of an eye. Memorial Day signals that the uncertainty of spring is finally heading toward the warmth of summer. Then, before you know it, the fireworks launch skyward, and stores are touting ‘back-to-school’ merchandise.
The MLB All-Star Game festivities began on Sunday, and NFL training camps open their doors later this week. Locally, the excitement of All-Star baseball and softball tournaments has concluded with some local teams advancing up the tournament ladder. Preparations are well underway for the Little League Baseball World Series, August 13-24, the earliest possible start date for the small fry classic.
Each year, the LLWS start date is tied to the Labor Day holiday. Little League organizers did not want the Series to run into Labor Day weekend, so the schedule is set to conclude the weekend before the holiday. This year, Labor Day falls on September 1, pushing the Series to the early start date.
Having spent many years serving as Little League’s Central Region Director, the excitement leading up to the various team arrivals in Williamsport has provided wonderful memories. Although there were a few duds along the way, the dedication of the coaches and support of the team’s fans made it special every year. Regardless of how many times the journey was traveled, each one provided unique experiences.
The coaching staff of some teams arriving for the World Series has been led by veteran coaches who have been serving the local community for years and have no youngsters on the team. Other times, the coaches may all be fathers of players on the team, who have caught ‘lightning in a bottle’ in just a few seasons in the dugout.
Like so many other youth volunteers, my Little League coaching career began when my son, Doug, was nine. I was asked to coach a team and enjoyed that father/son experience. Our team did quite well, winning some league championships. His 12-year-old year, we were engaged in a best-of-three playoff series for the league crown, which we lost in an exciting third game.
As the home team that evening, we were responsible for cleanup and putting everything away. As those chores were completed, darkness was setting in as father & son talked about the defeat and the time we spent together on the Little League field. He would be moving on to Junior League the next season, and I received a chance to coach in the division. I told him I thought he would benefit from the experience of playing for someone else, and I would be staying at the Little League level.
It was then I learned a lesson I have never forgotten.
He looked at me, with tears in his eyes, saying, “Dad, you were harder on me than any of the other kids on the team.”
My first reaction was disbelief; how could that be? We had a good team, and the players all got along well.
Then, as I gave it more thought in the days ahead, I realized, like so many other parent coaches before and after me, blood is truly thicker than water. It is only natural to want your own child to excel. While a parent or coach may treat all their players well, it is human nature to have one eye on your child while the other eye focuses on the remaining team players.
I have coached sports every season since then, but have never forgotten that lesson taught by my son. I’ve repeated its logic to others in similar situations several times since. Some have understood.
Youth sports are dependent upon volunteers for their existence in all areas of operation, but none more critical than coaches. However, just like parenting itself, until it is experienced, no one is truly prepared for what is to come. While competition in sports exists on the playing field, there is sometimes another type of competition taking place between the coach and the parent, centering around the child’s playing time or position.
Reading a recent article in USA Today, former MLB player Tom Gordon revealed his thoughts on parental involvement in youth sports.
“Let it be about them and be motivated to help them the best way possible. Remind them that nothing comes easy, and they are going to encounter some tough times.
“Be willing to allow your coach to coach your child. Then sit back in the stands and observe and watch the process. The toughest thing for a parent is when a coach changes your child’s position, and you don’t think that’s the right way. However, you are looking at it from a parent’s perspective outside, and the coach is looking at it from his/her team perspective.”
Whatever your role in sports may be, coach, parent, or player, there are three things each can control: your preparation, your attitude, and your emotions. All three add up to the best possible enjoyment sports can provide.
