I cannot believe the 2021 Little League regular season is coming to an end. Time goes by fast when you are having some fun. OK. I might complain that baseball gets in the way. But it seems like Michelle, Jensen, and I are at the ball field every single night. My fishing has suffered greatly. I have to plan accordingly. How about another cheeseburger platter for dinner? Sure. I guess.

So, we’ve been at it for a few months now. We have been very fortunate to play several games. Jensen is in his final year of the MAJORS. He plays for DIXON AC&R of Hepburn Lycoming. He and his chums are off to an impressive start. They are currently 12-2 and are peaking at the right time. Unfortunately, Jensen is looking more and more like a Spencer. The poor kid inherited my speed on the bases. My son enjoys the game of baseball. He throws strikes when his number is called. Jensen also plays some first base. He leads the team with singles that should have been triples. Thankfully he doesn’t read the WEBB WEEKLY.

I retired from coaching baseball in the summer of 2019. Despite what others say, it was totally my call to step away. I am still OK with that decision too. You might recall a few stories from the season I was asked to help. I cited many examples of the difficulties I was having. The other three dads had extensive on-field duties while I was in the dugout babysitting. My responsibilities then tripled when my first article broke. I was immediately named the executive pitch count director, USABat enforcer, and the pre- and post-game field maintenance chief. I did the best that I could. I was always on point with my calls and substitutions. I took ALL the credit for our successes. And I was the first to hide or pass the buck when things went sour. The boys never cried after a called strike three. They quickly ran back to the dugout with a smile because I always bought the team slushies. I was a player’s coach. Jensen and his friends thought I was cool. WHO TOLD YOU IT WAS OK TO EAT FRENCH FRIES IN THE DUGOUT? Coach Jamie. I was a great ASSISTANT coach.

So, I am still involved with Hepburn Little League. But this is in a totally different capacity. I was recently named the official public address announcer. OK, I have been doing this for twenty-some years. The higher-ups just gave me a ribbon. I am loving my new part-time gig. I have a birds-eye view of all the great action. I am that guy who plays cheesy 90’s Jock Jams. I am known to spice it up with a few well-timed sounds. The JAWS theme always gets applause. I do my best when it comes to pronunciations. It is easier said than done. IT’S HENDERS. NOT HENDERSON. OK. Consider this your only warning, if you correct me again, I will totally butcher it the next time up. It happens all the time.

My setup isn’t ideal. The mixer and wires are all taped in duct. The laptop is still using WINDOWS 95. YOU SHOULD REALLY DOWNLOAD SOME NEW MUSIC. Perhaps you want to come up here and do it? I don’t know why I am so sensitive.

I USUALLY remember to turn off my mic when I am not speaking. Unfortunately, this isn’t always the case.

Jensen was pitching a few nights back. I was giving him some encouragement. He gave me that look. I didn’t think much of it. But when the Umpire called ball four — I completely lost it. I received a text message immediately. JAMIE. TURN DOWN YOUR MICROPHONE. Then I realized that it was still on. Ouch. My bad, guys. I didn’t know my little tirade was broadcasted throughout the 17728.

I would like to give ALL the area Little Leagues some major love, especially those on DIXON AC&R. Thanks to Coach Fred, Coach Marc, and Coach Scott. Kudos to James, Ethan, Isaac, John, Jaxson, Mason, Jensen, DJ, Nick, LJ, Owen, and Kirby for all the great memories. I have enjoyed watching you boys develop. Cheers.