With the advent of middle and high school just around the corner, I wanted to suggest some vital courses for your kids to add to their agenda. Pronto. Our society is moving backward, not forward in many areas, including the basic of basics. In no particular order, here are some classes to definitely sign up for!
A. Don’t fret; it’s only etiquette: Defined, this means a customary code or polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group. In harshest form, it reveals rude people who have no regard or respect for others around them.
Why have youngsters stopped using the words “please” or “thank you” instead of demanding something and not acknowledging the time or trouble that someone did a task for them?
This challenging course taught by Miss Mildred Manners will show children how to hold doors for others, how to wait patiently for their turn in line, and how not to interrupt adults while talking.
Do your children know they should only call an adult by their first name if they know them well enough to do so? Otherwise, it’s Mr., Mrs., or Miss. Field trips are planned to finer restaurants where they will be taught table manners, which include not chewing or talking with their mouths full, no slurping of drinks, not putting their paws in front of other people’s plates, and no burping, belching or passing gas at the table. They will be shown to excuse themselves to the restroom, commonly known here as the “test room.”
B. Thrills, chills and social skills: Emphasis in this course will be human eye-to-eye contact during conversation, not looking blankly into a screen. They (cell phones) will be banned from all meals during training sessions. Children enrolled in this class will be expected to spread joy, and not to pout and expect pity.
They will be shown how to utilize a firm handshake when greeting someone and introducing themselves. Other components include cleaning up after themselves, not talking behind people’s backs, and treating people of all color, race, and religion with respect.
“Practice” rooms feature furniture where instructors will admonish them for propping feet on couches or tables. They will be shown not to put arms on the table while eating.
Certified instructors shall cover all aspects of dating. This includes telling young men they pay for the first date, they pull out any chair for the girl accompanying them, and how to handle wary parents. The issues of sexual harassment (including date rape) will be given special priority.
C. Beat the clock (time management): What youngster wouldn’t want to add crucial time to their busy day? This course will show them how to get at least eight hours of sleep each night, and still allow time slots for homework, family activities, meals, sports and hobbies, and “downtime” with friends. Their 24 hours will never be the same again! Parents will never have the chance to scream, “What a waste of a day!” This course taught by some of the best in the business — early risers to night watchmen!
D. It’s not that grave (death and dying): This course is geared for mature children and is not as morbid as it sounds since it prepares young adults to accept what they may feel is unacceptable. Mentors will explain not to “fear the grim reaper.” Course instruction includes how to prepare a living will, how to deal with the loss of a loved one, and discuss the philosophical matter of “life after death.” Students will be shown how and what to include in an obituary. Field trips include local cemeteries to observe older grave sites and to the coroner’s office to visit “customers who never complain.” Rides in hearses will also be provided as will casket selection or cremation options.
Aspects of all causes of death will be reviewed — accidents, disease, suicide, murder. Note: there are no refunds for any class offered, so please discuss this “bleak but not black” offering to your child before signing up.
E. It’s the money, honey (fiscal responsibility): The lucky children in this class will be taken to bankruptcy court to witness firsthand how people (including millionaires) can lose it all. They will be shown how to start and manage a budget. Special emphasis on “living and loving within your means.” Debt load and credit are of special focus here. Professor Spendthrift shows how a good credit score is as crucial as good nutrition!
F. Clutter in the gutter (eliminating toxic waste): This course teaches youngsters how to ax bad facets in their lives such as bullies, unhealthy relationships, and poor peer pressure demands. It will show them what constitutes a keeper (worthy friend) versus a weeper (loser). Self-esteem workshops provide plenty of opportunities for your child to flourish in his or her own light. Games such as “who do you think you are,” “don’t tread on me,” and “a hero can’t be a zero” will be utilized. A must do in the era of social media and bullying!
A wise man once said, “Often the very young, the untraveled, the naive, the unsophisticated deplore these formalities and don’t use them. It’s their downfall.” He was referring to manners and politeness.
In reality, it’s the parents (not teachers) responsibility to pass these important traits to their offspring, but they aren’t doing it because it was never stressed to them. In our generation (the boomers) it was smacked daily into us. Today’s parents don’t feel it’s important or necessary for children to have couth. In return, many of these kids are despicable and not well versed on topics I brought up. A shame.
If a parent is a slob and has no manners, no doubt the child will be following in their footsteps. Children emulate what they see and hear. As for dealing with death and taxes (monetary items), I wish I had been better prepared — it’s in these areas that maybe schools CAN provide information to young minds.
As they say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, even if it’s not very ripe for the picking. With that in mind, perhaps parents should enroll in the above classes WITH their children.
Can Your Kids Pass This Class?
With the advent of middle and high school just around the corner, I wanted to suggest some vital courses for your kids to add to their agenda. Pronto. Our society is moving backward, not forward in many areas, including the basic of basics. In no particular order, here are some classes to definitely sign up for!
A. Don’t fret; it’s only etiquette: Defined, this means a customary code or polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group. In harshest form, it reveals rude people who have no regard or respect for others around them.
Why have youngsters stopped using the words “please” or “thank you” instead of demanding something and not acknowledging the time or trouble that someone did a task for them?
This challenging course taught by Miss Mildred Manners will show children how to hold doors for others, how to wait patiently for their turn in line, and how not to interrupt adults while talking.
Do your children know they should only call an adult by their first name if they know them well enough to do so? Otherwise, it’s Mr., Mrs., or Miss. Field trips are planned to finer restaurants where they will be taught table manners, which include not chewing or talking with their mouths full, no slurping of drinks, not putting their paws in front of other people’s plates, and no burping, belching or passing gas at the table. They will be shown to excuse themselves to the restroom, commonly known here as the “test room.”
B. Thrills, chills and social skills: Emphasis in this course will be human eye-to-eye contact during conversation, not looking blankly into a screen. They (cell phones) will be banned from all meals during training sessions. Children enrolled in this class will be expected to spread joy, and not to pout and expect pity.
They will be shown how to utilize a firm handshake when greeting someone and introducing themselves. Other components include cleaning up after themselves, not talking behind people’s backs, and treating people of all color, race, and religion with respect.
“Practice” rooms feature furniture where instructors will admonish them for propping feet on couches or tables. They will be shown not to put arms on the table while eating.
Certified instructors shall cover all aspects of dating. This includes telling young men they pay for the first date, they pull out any chair for the girl accompanying them, and how to handle wary parents. The issues of sexual harassment (including date rape) will be given special priority.
C. Beat the clock (time management): What youngster wouldn’t want to add crucial time to their busy day? This course will show them how to get at least eight hours of sleep each night, and still allow time slots for homework, family activities, meals, sports and hobbies, and “downtime” with friends. Their 24 hours will never be the same again! Parents will never have the chance to scream, “What a waste of a day!” This course taught by some of the best in the business — early risers to night watchmen!
D. It’s not that grave (death and dying): This course is geared for mature children and is not as morbid as it sounds since it prepares young adults to accept what they may feel is unacceptable. Mentors will explain not to “fear the grim reaper.” Course instruction includes how to prepare a living will, how to deal with the loss of a loved one, and discuss the philosophical matter of “life after death.” Students will be shown how and what to include in an obituary. Field trips include local cemeteries to observe older grave sites and to the coroner’s office to visit “customers who never complain.” Rides in hearses will also be provided as will casket selection or cremation options.
Aspects of all causes of death will be reviewed — accidents, disease, suicide, murder. Note: there are no refunds for any class offered, so please discuss this “bleak but not black” offering to your child before signing up.
E. It’s the money, honey (fiscal responsibility): The lucky children in this class will be taken to bankruptcy court to witness firsthand how people (including millionaires) can lose it all. They will be shown how to start and manage a budget. Special emphasis on “living and loving within your means.” Debt load and credit are of special focus here. Professor Spendthrift shows how a good credit score is as crucial as good nutrition!
F. Clutter in the gutter (eliminating toxic waste): This course teaches youngsters how to ax bad facets in their lives such as bullies, unhealthy relationships, and poor peer pressure demands. It will show them what constitutes a keeper (worthy friend) versus a weeper (loser). Self-esteem workshops provide plenty of opportunities for your child to flourish in his or her own light. Games such as “who do you think you are,” “don’t tread on me,” and “a hero can’t be a zero” will be utilized. A must do in the era of social media and bullying!
A wise man once said, “Often the very young, the untraveled, the naive, the unsophisticated deplore these formalities and don’t use them. It’s their downfall.” He was referring to manners and politeness.
In reality, it’s the parents (not teachers) responsibility to pass these important traits to their offspring, but they aren’t doing it because it was never stressed to them. In our generation (the boomers) it was smacked daily into us. Today’s parents don’t feel it’s important or necessary for children to have couth. In return, many of these kids are despicable and not well versed on topics I brought up. A shame.
If a parent is a slob and has no manners, no doubt the child will be following in their footsteps. Children emulate what they see and hear. As for dealing with death and taxes (monetary items), I wish I had been better prepared — it’s in these areas that maybe schools CAN provide information to young minds.
As they say, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, even if it’s not very ripe for the picking. With that in mind, perhaps parents should enroll in the above classes WITH their children.
Gerry Ayers
AUTHOR
PROFILE