For many, the holiday season brings joy and is a feast for the senses. It is a time when the house smells of holiday spices such as cinnamon and nutmeg and sweet treats baking — the noise of family gatherings and holiday music playing in the background. Decorations light up the neighborhood at night, and festivities keep us busy. For others, however, the holidays can be a time of great stress and even depression. Feelings of obligation dominate, and the chaos and commercialism of it all lead some people to just wish it would end. Many people do not have family or friends to keep them company, and for them, it triggers feelings of great loss. According to the Mayo Clinic, Johns Hopkins Medical School, and other health experts, certain steps can be taken to alleviate much of the tension that might come with this time of year.
Own your feelings. Experts at the Mayo Clinic suggest that if you feel stressed, acknowledge it. If you feel sad, that’s ok as well. Anger, tension, happiness, joy — whatever the feeling, own it and be honest with yourself and others. Bottling up these emotions will only make negative feelings worse.
Accept imperfection. Everyday life is never perfect, so why should the holidays be any different? Sometimes plans change, or you can’t find the perfect gift. Maybe dinner gets burned, or you have an argument with a loved one. Roll with it and move on so you can enjoy the good things that are going on. Sometimes imperfect is still pretty awesome.
Practice forgiveness. There is a saying that hate is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. Set aside old grievances or at least put them on pause. Letting go is not weakness but strength. Chances are you will feel significantly better and may even heal some relationships in the process.
Plan but be flexible. It is impossible to plan for everything but prepare as much as possible. Set aside time to shop for food and gifts. Prep what you can for meals. Make time for visits with friends and family. Organize as much as possible while allowing for change (see previous paragraph). Most things won’t go exactly to plan, but planning does help keep things somewhat less stressful.
Talk it out. If you feel completely overwhelmed, talk to someone. A friend, family member, someone at church, or even an online counselor. For some, the holidays can be a time of extreme loneliness. No one should ever have to feel that they are completely isolated, however. There are numerous support groups and counselors available to help you get through tough times.
Just say no. It is our nature as humans to want to please each other. If someone close to us asks for help or wants us to visit, it can be hard to turn them down, especially this time of the year. Sometimes, however, we simply cannot fit it all in. Just politely say no. Your friends, co-workers, and family will usually be understanding — eventually.
Take a time-out. With all of the chaos of cooking, shopping, parties, and people, sometimes we just need a break. Take a time-out. A break might be just what you need to recharge your batteries and help you remember what you love most about this time of year. Take a walk. Read a book. Mediate or simply turn on some soothing music.
Practice self-care. Just because the holidays are a busy time of the year does not mean that you should completely ignore yourself. Eat healthy food and get plenty of sleep. Manage your stress and exercise. Avoid tobacco and excessive alcohol, and, most importantly, be kind to yourself.
This year don’t let the holidays turn into something you dislike or just want to survive. Make the most of this time of the year by focusing on the things that matter, such as friends and family. If you’re lonely, reach out to a friend. If you don’t have one, make one. Be mindful of what the holidays are meant to symbolize, and allow yourself to feel the joy that you deserve.
